Is it worth it?

Good news is, I *can* keep my job and I *am* getting admitted to the training program. The bad news is, they didn't want to admit me in the first place not because of a technicality, but because they didn't think I'd be able to swing the TOPT. That's the big ugly language test that you have to spank to continue teaching foreign language.

Remember when I took that pre-test and the questions were like " how do you feel about marajuana legalization?" Would you be able to answer that off the cuff, immediately, in English even? Jesus.

Anyway, they sympathised and it's a well-known fact that test is a bear. I agreed I would work at it everyday. I am emailing a game-plan to the head of the teacher preparation program...in which I agreed to take a supplemental French conversation course at Richland College. Super. That's the only DCC that offers an upper level French class. And I know what I had at UNT will be way above the level I will be taking...I made in A in French conversation. Don't get me wrong; I will take the class and it will help simply by being able to talk to other people in French. I need practice to get where it's natural. I will be reading le figaro every day. It's just that I'm only planning on doing this teaching thing for about 3 years. I'm afraid I will get sucked in and not go to grad school to work on my psyc masters. Teaching will be a good background for applying for a masters. But, I feel as though I am signing my life away. I guess that's how it works for any job, Leave the house at 5:30 AM...come home after dark only to eat dinner and go to bed. Now a night class on mondays on top of the weekend training seminars. I don't even think I have sundays off.

I need to start reading the first year teaching book my principal recommended, but I can't even afford food right now. See, that's a great motivator. Job = stressful, but there is a guarantee of $$....more $$ than most ppl my age make. I will be able to afford the brand-name maccaroni and cheese and couches from Ikea, and maybe I'll actually get to practice French in France in December!!!

Another thing that I hope will motivate me, I get to meet some of the students on Monday at orientation. That's pretty freaking sweet......I get to explain and share one of my most favorite things with high school kids. I may not be able to flawlessly rattle off on foreign policy yet, but I sure can get " un deux trois rouge blanc bleu enchantée, je m'appelle..." without a hitch.

Off to my orientation.