I had my first teacher dream. In it, my kids were HORRIBLE. I resorted to jumping on a desk, dinging my bell, raising both hands in the air and yelling " ECOUTEZ!" at the top of my lungs. All to no avail. I then tried to remember everything they taught me in training and nothing came to mind that would be effective....this was the worst scenario I could think of. My final action was to go around to each kid that happened to be on task and passed out gift certificates to On The Border. When I announced to the bad kids that they had missed out, they were like, " fuck this, fuck you, I'm going to the mall".

Oh God. Let it not be that bad.

Today was a great day. My best friend called me and said, " Sarah! I was drinking a vanilla coke and listening to the Garden State Soundtrack and thought about you." What a nice way to be remembered...I'm glad it wasn't like " Sarah, I'm drinking a jager bomb and reading Crack Whore Magazine and thought of you".

My mom took me back-to-school shopping. Ian helped; he wanted me to get something lime green or tiger-printed. It was nice going shopping with my mom, because I don't think I've actually done it in years. We went to the mall that I worked in when I was 16. It's weird the little things you remember. I came in the same entrance I always did, and remembered calculating how much faster the Hallmark clock was than the one in my car....how late I would be. I remember sneaking in my color-coded psychology notes or my phys & ana lab. Going to chic fil a on my break and getting free sweet tea...the creepy guy from Foley's with whom I went on a blind date . Working at the mall in highschool is like a rite of passage. For me it was kinda like "Fast Times at Ridgemont High", without the sex or Sean Penn. Think more along the lines of crappy uniforms; stupid shenanigans. There were the sophomore girls from Plano East who rolled blunts in the breakroom when the manager left, but that's a different story...

My point was, I guess that time flies. I like how I'm nostalgic. Some people find nostalgia pointless...the past is the past. And, especially if your past kinda sucked, why would you want to remember?

Good question. I think for me...it's a growing thing. It's good for me to think " look where you were....look where you are...look where you're going," in every aspect of life. See how I've worked so many crappy jobs? I feel like I've made it. Tons of room for improvement.

I feel fulfilled.

oh, the State-of-the-Matt address: Wonderful once more! Endorphins are leaping for joy from one neuron to the next. The way he says my name....the dimples in his smile. His pretty eyes framed in thick lashes. We just get each other. The moments of doubt for me are because I know it would be such a heart-crunching disappointment to lose him.

I've got a Mayumi date for some good beer and good grub, and then watching the motorcyle diaries with mi amor. I've been wanting to see that for awhile!