You know.....I really wish I could be completely honest and open about everything I think about everything.....but it just won't happen on a blog, and it's hard to talk to people in real life. I envy Trevor for writing whatever the hell is on his mind, even if I don't agree with it/makes me uncomfortable. I'm alllllll about free speech, even though I feel weird practicing it.

Nights like this, I wish I could just smoke a lot of pot and write something cool like Be Here Now. ( Written by a former psychologist who got turned on to mushrooms in the 60s-70s. A lot of religious dribble and pretty pictures.) But, I don't. Because I just don't because....well the reasons why are just obvious aren't they. I'm me and guess I just missed the whole experiementation phase, or I didn;t need it, orrrrrr...I've always felt it's out of character. I hate that expression.

I'm still in so many respects, undecided, unprepared, inhibited. Am I still compromising? How will I know?

My temporary solution ( because if I don't have one, I won't get anything done), will be to polish off the Strawberry Hill Boone's Farm, finish making my construction paper francophonic country flags for my room, and listen to Stevie Wonder's "Sir Duke" & " Superstition" and sing loud.

PS - the new Johnny Cash movie looks like it will be super. I saw "the Island", that's good....and I want to see the Swedish(?) movie about the quadraplegics playing rugby.